Like all good head cases, Andy Schleck is headed back to California where we understand how to handle the psychological issues that have derailed the top climbers’ career.
The Younger Schleck — the one with the mental problem, not the banned diuretic one — is doing the wise thing by buying a ticket to the West Coast. He needs to, like, chill and get in touch with himself and tap the positive vibrations.
The Luxembourger said it himself: “I came out of the tunnel. Now, I do not want to dwell on it. It’s behind me. I prefer to focus on positive things and there are a lot,” said Schleck.
You bet there are positives — like the beautiful beaches and hot girls and plenty of sunshine and an embarrassment of good psychiatrists, therapists, sports docs, energy channelers and vegan tantric goddesses who tap the forces of crystals.
This is the place for Andy Schleck to get his mental mojo together. Part vacation, part training, a head trip as much as a training block. This is Andy Schleck’s Road Trip To Recovery.
We relate to the fragile and talented Schleck here in California. There won’t be those annoying euro media types rehashing all the negative stories and debilitating past events. That’s just not cool here in Cali, dude.
Cali fans love Andy and unconditional adoration and support is what the man needs more than work on his descending skills. We’re against anything that isn’t pedal positive, life-affirming, health-inducing and joy-generating. Screw the Giro d’Italia.
California knows that Andy wants to have some fun, for godsakes. When his dad was suggesting his son retire, we knew what the old man was talking about. Europe can be such a downer and those roads are so narrow and crowded anyway — who wants to race down those in the rain?
No, California has nice wide, smooth scenic roads and there’s little fighting for position unless you’re trying to get Sagan’s wheel for a sprint finish. Andy can put it in cruise control and motor on up from Souther California to San Francisco, cross the Golden Gate Bridge to the Sonoma wine country of Santa Rosa.
And if at the conclusion of the Tour of California, Andy wants to have a few glasses of killer pinot noir, then we say, go right ahead. Nobody is gonna get all bitter and judgmental and post some pissy comment on a facebook page just because Andy commandeered the team bus for a quick winery tour. Hell, we will personally pour him a reserve pinot that will knock his team issue Craft socks off.
California is good times, baby. Andy Schleck has done enough existential suffering and now it’s time for bright sunshine and having fun on the bike again. “I’ve had the wind in my face, as they say in cycling. But it will turn. I think I’m on the right track,” said Schleck.
That’s right — cross the ocean, land in Los Angeles, bring your race bike. We say welcome Andy Schleck. Your 2014 Tour de France victory begins here.