Now that Monsieur Prudhomme has been kind enough to show us the route for the 2010 Tour de France, we can begin the official craving phase. Ticking down the months, the weeks, days and hours before Armstrong and Schleck and Contador go mano-a-mano and pedalo-a-pedalo. Is that a word — just took a crack at it for grins. You never know, could be pedal in Portuguese.
Until now, like jailed criminals in our stripped jammies, we’ve been forced to mark off each interminable day until July 4th, the prologue in Rotterdam, The Netherlands. How will we survive this agonizing time? With a handy, dandy 99 cent iphone app called Tour de France Countdown.
Sure, it’s going to be a long, painful wait. We may go through all sorts of horrible phases, forced to watch seniors golf, bull riding and badminton. Weekends will be spent playing Kings Corners with the kids. Things are gonna get ugly before they get better and we finally hear the dulcet tones of Phil Liggett and Paul Sherwen — and everyone knows Phil is God.
But we’ll get thru this sports nightmare, this Tour de France desert we must cross, knowing at each and every moment, exactly when true salvation will arrive. You know Lance has one on his iphone– the man is meticulous. In fact, after their shopping spree, every rider on Radio Shack has one or else.
Vive le Tour. How many days till Rotterdam now? And exactly how many seconds is that?