We’re not surprised two-time Tour de France champion Alberto Contador wants a few new clauses inserted in his Astana contract.
We imagine he’s thinking of adding quite a few more besides the one allowing him to leave if the team has even one doping violation.
Here are the top 10 he’s still considering:
1) No singing of Kazah folk songs on the team bus. That was annoying last year.
2) Absolutely no mandatory drinking games with Alexandre Vinokourov.
3) Free gas for life from the Kazah oil company.
4) Salary paid in cash each week, no exceptions or contract terminated.
5) All Astana staff and support employees must purchase $500 worth of my “El Pistelero” merchandise. (see note #6)
6) Astana to fund establishment of an “Alberto” boutique in Madrid to sell El Pistelero merchandise.
7) From here on, I always get to sit at the head of the dinner table. P.S. I am NOT buying snacks for the rest of the squad anymore!
8) My ipod ONLY. No more sharing the stereo with other team-mates. I put up with Armstrong’s Foo Fighters crap but that time is over.
9) No more making fun of my brother Fran. It’s short for Francisco, okay? So stop joking that he sounds like the cleaning lady in a bad sit- com. Not funny.
10) Everyone must speak SPANISH ONLY or I’m outa here. Don’t make me mad, don’t annoy me, don’t tick me off. No Habla Kazak, got it?