Pozzato arrives in Australia, still no sex.

//Pozzato arrives in Australia, still no sex.

Pozzato arrives in Australia, still no sex.

Pozzato. How long can he go without sex?

Abstinence king Filippo Pozzato NoSexo joined his Italian teammates for a morning ride in Geelong.

The designated captain of the Italian squad hasn’t had sex since he broke up with his girlfriend before the Giro. That’s five months of self imposed control and part of his preparation for the World Championships.

Focus, focus, focus, must not lose vital seed, must keep testosterone in elevated state of readiness, not not allow sexual charms of podium girls or even tanned healthy Australian girls distract him from the final prize.

According to rumors which only Twisted SPoke is privy to, Pozzato has forbidden himself the pleasures of cable porn in his hotel. In fact, he has erased the cookies for all his favorite porn sites.

Nobody said winning a medal in Melbourne would be easy. Pro cycling is a hard man’s life and it’s getting harder all the time, as far as Pozzato is concerned.

After his 70k training spin, Filippo said “this first ride is a confirmation of the sensations I had in July.” No, not those sensations, the ones in his legs, folks. Abstinence, always.

Australian porn starlets have offered to help relieve Pozzato of his burden but Pozzato has refused the advances. The man is 100% committed to bringing home the rainbow jersey. However the minute he crosses the finish line, look out — the man may simply grab the first woman he sees and have his way. Police and photographers have been alerted.

Just how long can Filippo Pozzato go without sex? Well, looking at the race profile, at least another 262.7 kilometers.

By |2019-02-03T16:24:17-08:00September 23rd, 2010|Humor|0 Comments

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