We had a sizable amount of euros on the member of the British Empire for the sprint finish into Tours.
There are few things as motivating as a shower of warm urine and we figured that Cav would surely win stage 12 so he could tell the world — or a small minority of French or Belgian fans — to piss off.
Everything went true to form and in fact better than could be expected. A crash on the run-in to Tours wrecked the chances of Andre Greipel. One major rival out of the picture.
Warm urine is a disgusting thing when it drenches a lycra jersey — which already stinks from five hours of serious aerobic activity. Things like that would make Cavendish mad — so when he hit the front for the sprint, who didn’t think that Tour history would repeat again? The man has, what, something like 24 stage wins in France?
Instead it was young German sprinter Marcel Kittel, whose thighs are even bigger and scarier than Andre Greipel’s, who edged out the Manxman. A shocking result when you consider how dominant Cav has been in Le Grand Shindig. Kittel now has three stage wins in the Tour and can rightly call himself bad-ass.
Cavendish was pissed of before so imagine how pissed off he is now?
Remember that Cavendish used to have the most powerful sprint train since the days of Saeco and the Lion King, Mario Cipolini. Now Cavendish has the third or fourth best locomotive in the Tour after Griepel’s Lotto-Belisol boys and the Argos-Shimano squad of Marcel Kittel. Even Peter Sagan’s Cannondale outfit has as much preicison and horse power.
Cavendish managed three Tour stage wins despite minimal support from his Sky teammates in last year’s Grand Boucle. Are things getting even worse?
He surely misses former lead-out Mark Renshaw and body guard Bernard Eisel and how much would he pay right now to have Tom Boonen leading him out?
It’s an odd Tour for Cavendish but then again, there’s always the Champs Elysees to set things right.