Armstrong-Hamilton. A game of cache-cache.

Tyler Hamilton. A near bathroom brawl.

How about the irony in the name of the restaurant where Lance Armstrong tried to square off against former teammate and friend and now ex-friend Tyler Hamilton? The Cache Caache restaurant in Aspen, Colorado.

The name is French for the game of hide and seek. If you consider the doping allegations leveled against the Boss by Landis and Hamilton (who have both confessed to their own transgressions) there are several careers’ worth of hide and seek. You might ad hiding from investigators, UCI anti-doping officials, customs agents, border patrols and prying journalists.

Then you’d have to enjoy the deeper level of cache-cache. Hamilton was living dangerously in a known Armstrong hangout but believed Lance was out of town and therefore it was safe for entry. Hide and seek in the Rocky Mountain home of the super rich.

Only to Hamilton’s dismay, Armstrong was in town and worse, in the mood to drop by the restaurant. Then the winner of seven-for-now Tour de France’s decided to seek out Hamilton as the the man with the 60 Minutes confession finished up his personal hygiene routine. It didn’t help that Hamilton was wearing an old Phonak jersey.

What happened next depends on who you believe, the strength of your allegiances and your personal definitions of truth and lies. Outside Magazine editor Abe Streep reported that Hamilton told him, “He wanted to get into it. I was like, ‘Let’s step outside and talk away from the crowd, but he wouldn’t. He said, ‘No one cares.’” How perfect, yeah, take it outside for Outside magazine.

Then again maybe it was Hamilton who got feisty and even if not, Lance Armstrong has enough money in the bank to pay a few eyewitnesses to see things his way. Cache Cache owner Jodi Larner, a friend of Armstrong’s, reportedly told Hamilton that he could finish his meal but wasn’t welcome back at the restaurant. I mean you have to choose friends wisely — do you want the disgraced rider with the Olympic gold medal or the famous rider under serious investigation and fighting for his life and legend?

In any case, it’s just another exciting chapter in Armstrong’s war against the federal investigation into allegations of doping on the U.S. Postal team during his run of victories in the Tour de France. Have to think that Armstrong head-hunter Jeff Novitzky got a real hoot out of the story. The mad mennonite Floyd Landis is probably still on the floor laughing.

Really, for two guys who have given so many urine samples in their professional careers to engage in some kind of man-a-mano outside a restroom is comedy in and of itself.

Many lies over many years told to everyone from loved ones to millions and millions of cycling fans. Hide and Seek, Cache Cache and it all comes together outside the restroom in Aspen, Colorado.

Maybe if we want to clean up cycling, we do need to start in the bathroom. Then we can wash our hands of this whole thing, so to speak. Almost surprising that UCI president Patrick McQuaid wasn’t also there and half zipped up when the action began.

Still, it reminds Twisted Spoke of another kid’s game. Tag, you’re it, Mr Armstrong.

Twitter Digg Delicious Stumbleupon Technorati Facebook Email
  • Pingback: Lance Armstrong,Tyler Hamilton, the writer and the restauranteur | VeloToday

  • http://twitter.com/TurboCrank @TurboCrank

    I can wait until they play Red Rover in court. Red rover, red rover send George over.

    • http://www.atwistedspoke.com TwistedSpoke

      Nice, well-played. George is Red Rover and it's all over. Matt

  • tomsawyer

    Lance was heard saying to Tyler: "It's time to get outta Dodge ya little runt; this swanky town ain't big 'nough fer the two o' us. I'm gonna use Hunter Thompson's suicide gun on ya if ya don't take yer vermin followers an' hit the road. It's gonna be a hole in yer head or a hole in my head before this is over, an' I'm gonna try like hell ta make sure it ain't me gettin' it in the melon."